Category Archives: JOKES

Happy New Year 2011! Or not, as the case may be. The police came to my door on New Year’s Eve, holding a picture of the missus. “Is this your wife sir?” said the officer. “Yes it is” I replied. … Continue reading →

Yes folks, it’s THAT time of year again! The month of December is when we drag a dead tree into our living room and eat chocolate out of an old sock! If it’s Christmas, get a turkey. If it’s raining … Continue reading →

A blind man enters a lesbian bar by mistake. He finds his way to a bar stool and orders a drink. After sitting there for a while, he yells to the barman, “Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?” The … Continue reading →

Paddy was waiting at the bus stop with his mate when a lorry went by loaded up with rolls of turf. Paddy said, ‘I gonna do that when I win lottery’. ‘What’s dat, says his mate. ‘Send me lawn away … Continue reading →

A ‘typical’ bloke, having split from his latest girlfriend, decided to take a holiday. He booked himself on a cruise and proceeded to have the time of his life, that is, until the ship sank. He found himself on an … Continue reading →

Two female co-workers are having a conversation at work. Woman 1: Did you have good sex last night? Woman 2: No, it was a disaster… my husband came home, ate his dinner in 3 minutes, got on top of me, … Continue reading →

Two businessmen were sitting down for a break in their soon-to-be new shop… As yet, the shop wasn’t ready, with only a few shelves set up. One said to the other, “I bet any minute now some pensioner is going … Continue reading →

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumpty had a great fall The structure of the wall was incorrect So he won a grand with Claims Direct. ———————————————————— It’s Raining, It’s Pouring. Oh S ** t, it’s Global Warming. ———————————————————– … Continue reading →